Sometimes I can pretend to forget that fact, yet sometimes it haunts everything. The house that we live in is the one they built together four years ago. The walls are green, yellow, and burgundy because she picked out the colors and painted them herself. The flowers in the flower beds and bushes out front were planted there by her two hands. Every day at least one of kids mentions something about her. The neighbors talk to me about her (luckily it’s always positive towards me).
It will be a long time before we’re financially able to sell this house. It makes me sad to know that we might never have “our” house. I can’t have any more kids. It makes me sad that we will never have “our” family pictures. It seems like we’ll forever be two separate families trying to live in the same house.
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That must be really, really hard. I hope with time you'll find your special place together where you can keep making memories.
ReplyDeleteIf you have a chance, stop by my blog, there is something there for you. Take care
I'm so sorry that you're feeling down. I have to admit I've always been so grateful that we live in what was MY house and not theirs. When I first became a stepmother I felt constantly haunted by her "ghost" (she's not dead by the way - just to clarify!) - I felt like she was everywhere. So I can't imagine how saddening it must be to feel like it's not YOUR family and YOUR home. No real advice other than to REDESIGN!!!! Decorate, get new furniture and re-landscape the garden. Make it as yours as you possible can.
ReplyDeleteLots of love. xxx
I am sorry this is getting you down. I recommend a few cans of paint. You can change the look for very little investment, and that might be the best thing to starting to make "their" home...yours.
ReplyDeleteYou can also tear out the landscaping relatively cheap, and it is free to rearrange furniture. Put your stamp on things.
I can completely understand where you are coming from. The BF had a house with his ex-wife, not the baby mama but knowing that he built it with his ex, got the BM knocked up there was WAY TO MUCH for me. Luckily he was able to sale and we bought a new house together. While it doesn't solve all issues it can help. Keep saving up but in the mean time make the house YOUR own. I would start some family projects to redecorate, whether it’s new paint, new flowers whatever. Find some fairly inexpensive ways to do it. Who knows you might find the process therapeutic!
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